When I was younger, we moved a lot. Probably an average of every two years. When I was 13 we moved to Klamath Falls, OR, where I lived until I was 21. That was the longest I’ve lived anywhere.
I used to hate (yes, a strong word- and I mean it) to move to another town, another state, start a new school, meet new people- all over again. It seemed that right as I was getting used to where I lived, my mom would say we were moving. I don’t recall all the reasons we moved although I am sure I was told. In my mind, it wouldn’t have mattered anyway.
Now I am married (have been for 14 1/2 years) and I have two kids of my own. And we move an average of every two years.
There is a difference however from my past and the present that I live. In my past, I was shy and insecure with myself and with others. I could not communicate well until I had known someone for quite a while. I never really made it to that point until I met my husband. By the time I made it to high school (and even though we’d not moved for more than two years) I was almost an extreme introvert. I functioned well enough at school and made some superficial friends but I’d learned so well to keep all at a distance so as not to hurt too bad when the time came to move. None of my high school friends are my friends now.
I never wanted that for my own kids. And yet here we are. About to move yet again. This time it’s been almost three years in one place. But there are differences. One of those differences is that we homeschool.
I really believe that it will make a huge difference in the way my kids look at their childhood and the moving we do now.
I won’t say that those who don’t homeschool cannot be a moving family and be ‘okay’ with it. I’m just saying I think my kids will feel differently about the moving during their childhood than I did about moving during mine. Here are a few reasons why:
1. Because we homeschool, the kids always have the same school atmosphere. There are no new teachers (unless we join a co-op) and no new faces in class to get used to. There is no trying to fit in at school- again. They always fit at home.
2. As a family we spend more time together because we homeschool. Instead of only spending 2-3 hours each day during the week together, we get every day together like it’s Saturday and Sunday. We take ‘field trips’ (like that camping trip to South Dakota to see Mt. Rushmore and Crazy Horse) together. We go on vacation without the worry about school work being turned in (if it really is needed, they do it on the way) at random times of the year. Our life and our school in a way blends together. So both are a constant for them.
3. We make the effort to keep in contact with friends they’ve left behind. A yearly trip to see family often (well it has every time so far) includes a stop at their friends for a few days. They can make calls and write to their friends. I highly encourage it. I’ve even gone over my minutes so that they could have that… (don’t encourage that).
4. We try to make the best of wherever we are. We live a block from the public library now and they know us there by name. We will try to volunteer in the places we will move to like we volunteer at the library’s used book sale here.
5. We try to stay positive. Regardless of where you go- there you are. We’ve tried to teach our children that we make the place and experience good or bad (for the most part). We can choose to enjoy where we are for what is or we can be sour and dislike everything.
These may not be guarantees that they will look back on our moving days positively but I certainly hope it helps. I have tried within the last few years to re-evaluate how I feel about the moving we did.
I was born in Alaska, lived in Texas, three different towns in Ohio, perhaps a little while in Kentucky on a secluded piece of land, and four different towns in Oregon before I was 13. At 21 I moved again to another town in Oregon, then to Nebraska. Eighteen months after that, it was back to a different town in Oregon. Now we live in Wyoming and are gearing up to move to Ohio. For the kids it will be their sixth move since they were born.
They are both excited and nervous about the move. But it isn’t because they will have to start all over, really. We just pick up more as we go- more friends, more experiences. I don’t think that we could do this moving thing so smoothly if we didn’t homeschool. Or maybe I am just finding more reasons to keep on homeschooling. Either way, I’m glad we do.
